"You are my sunshine."

So i basically just spent four nights at Paige's house. (: I'm pretty sure it was a blast. I think i gained like a zillion pounds with how much food we ate. I love how it felt so much like home. I seriously hope i can go to Iowa with her. It would seriously be a blast.

Life is good. I'm seriously so content with life right now i don't need a boy too make me happy. I'm done with him and his drama. Here comes the new me. The Mercedes that always has a smile on her face just because she can. I'm happy. (:

"Hi, I'm writing a term paper on the finer things in life, & i am wondering if i could interview you." :)

"My name is Mercedes Lynn Caldwell, & sexy pants turn me on. " (:

As the days go on.

Here comes the Anxiety again. It seriously just hit me, just when i thought it was gone. I cant sleep, cant eat. I hate this, i hate everything. I seriously have anxiety over the stupidest things. I think about dying the most though. That is the biggest thing i am scared of. Seriously even if i am in a car and we get close to another car, i have too look away or else i will freak out thinking we are going to get in a car wreck. I wake up in the middle of the night just too make sure everyone in my house is breathing. It sounds so freaking dumb but i seriously can not help it. I don't know why i am like this but i hate it.

Today was good i loved hanging out with you. (:

But i never know what your thinking, help me read your mind?

I have been having the most wonderful est days ever. (: you have no clue. i finally found the people i need too be around. They just make my day! There is seriously no DRAMA. i love it. They don't expect anything other than myself, i can be a total freak and they will just join in. (: These are the type of people you keep.

Your backing off again. I hate this the most. I hate how i try so hard and you dont even care. but i seriously cant get over you, its not possible. Im going too keep fighting till the end trust me baby i just dont give up for nothing. (:

"long as i'm with you it really don't matter" (:

So i broke yet another charger. (: I just made Brandon let me use his until i got a new one. Seriously i sware that boy does anything i tell him too. Well walked around with the best friend all day. (: "I'm not mad, I'm just very FUCKING disappointed!" I can talk to her about anything. Seriously. This summer has been really good, i have made a lot of new friends, and gotten really close too a lot of people.

I miss you. (: you just seem to get more and more amazing each day. I might sound like I'm crazy, obsessive but you have no clue how much i like this guy. He mean alot too me.

Live for today, Hope for tomorrow

Been hanging out with Sammy for the past two days. (: pretty much fun.

Today was vacation bible school, oh so much fun. It makes me laugh when 5th graders think there top shit because they are going into middle school so they think they can give you attitudes. Seriously bitch i could annihilate you! (: Ha oh and i looked after this girl named Bayley. She 4 and pretty adorable, but yet so freaking shy. I love little kids. But so not saying i want one! (:

You seriously make me smile. (:

Be yourself, believe in yourself. Don't you hate it when people try to hard to be someone else, instead of just being there self. Brandon is just like that. The whole neighborhood was hanging out today and he was trying to show off like always. Seriously you think because you wear "indie" clothing, or burn in-scents makes you a "hippie". Stop trying to be like Kyle. That is exactly what he is trying to do. Its dumb.

I hung out with you today. (: it was amazing. You have no idea how much you make me smile. I could sit there and talk to you for hours on end. I love how i can be myself around you. ah.

Going to go lay down. 6am run AGAIN. (:
Hopefully you'll text me.

This morning i went for a morning jog. I have not worked out in so long i am so out of shape, but you have to start sometime. After i got done running i just felt so good. I am ready to start working out again. (:

I talked to you again today. I cant help but smile when i talk to you. I keep my phone right next too me just so if you text. Every time it rings i hope it is you. I know it sounds pathetic, but baby i am head over hills for you. You just give me butterflies. (:

Well 6a.m jog again tomorrow. I am ready to make this a everyday thing.

Well off to clean my room, and maybe you will call. (:

" You can sit beside me when the world comes down."

Going to Greensburg made me realize that to change the world you have to start in baby steps. Everyday i went to go work on houses and it just felt so good. It does not matter how much work we had too do, how hot it was outside, or how dirty we got we were doing it for others and that is all that matters. If i could go do that everyday of the year, i would.


I was finally getting over you while i was there too, but then you called. Your voice sounded so sweet, and it is what i wanted to hear. I seriously can't stop thinking about you. I know you say you like me , i know you say i am amazing, but i know your just playing with my heart. You have no idea how Crazy i am about you. Boy please just make up your mind.